Tears, smiles, hugs… Families finally reunited. Since Friday, 69 people held hostage by Hamas since the attack on Israel have been released and have been able to reunite with their loved ones. Among them, many children who have experienced the worst. Eitan Yahalomi, a 12-year-old Franco-Israeli, is one of them. This Tuesday, his aunt explained that “Hamas forced him to watch” the abuses committed and filmed on October 7 by its fighters. “Every time a child cried, they threatened him with a gun to keep him quiet,” she added. “How can you feel good after an experience like that? He has a long way to go. […] He is a calm child. It’s going to take time to let out your emotions. »
How can we help these children get through this “long road”? What impact can these images and memories have on their psyche? We asked the question to two specialists in childhood psychotrauma.
Will very young children remember the trauma they experienced?
Contrary to popular belief, children, even very young ones, are aware of their environment. “If traumatic images are only perceived from the age of 3 or 4, sensory impressions will leave traces from a very young age,” immediately warns Florence Askenazy, professor of child psychiatry and the teenager, author of Child psychotrauma, understanding and treating (Editions First). Studies show that the impact of trauma can occur in an infant or even during pregnancy. »
“It’s reassuring to say that the child has not understood or that he will get over it because he is young, but it is totally false,” insists Hélène Romano, specialized psychotherapist, author of When life hurts children And Children and war (Odile Jacob). Children are the adults of tomorrow. If we deny their traumas, this will result in a generation of men and women in psychological distress. » While some may seem smiling and not very upset, it is, according to her, a protective mechanism. “A traumatized child does not complain. He does everything so that we don’t see his suffering, often so that the adults don’t break down and leave. This is what we have seen in studies of children who are victims of natural disasters or wars. »
What consequences will these traumas have on their psyche?
The multiplicity of traumas experienced by children taken hostage by Hamas is quite unique: bereavement, kidnapping, separation, captivity, not to mention everything that we do not yet know. “These are cumulative traumas very close together,” explains the professor of psychiatry. There are few possible comparisons, so we cannot guess what their psychological state will be. »
However, according to the specialist, after a single collective psychotrauma, such as a natural disaster, 70% of survivors will become “resilient”, that is to say without associated traumatic symptoms. In the event of an intentional collective trauma, such as a terrorist attack, 45% will develop disorders. Among them: generalized anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, but also sleep difficulties, separation anxiety or phobias.
This suffering is expressed differently depending on whether it is an adult or a child, according to Hélène Romano. “In children, it is often the body that speaks, with somatic disorders such as alopecia areata, dermatological problems, asthma. » According to the psychiatrist professor, “the younger they are, the more vulnerable they are and the higher the risk of complications”.
How can we take care of these children compared to adults?
According to Hélène Romano, “the priority is to provide a feeling of physical security and psychological protection. » It will therefore first be a question of ensuring their basic needs: having a roof over their heads, being protected, being able to sleep, wash, eat and be physically cared for. “In France, we would make a very precise assessment of the psychological, traumatic and physical state of the child,” adds the professor of psychiatry. Depending on the result, targeted therapies would be implemented to prevent an increase in symptoms. » Short-term therapies, but not only. “Monitoring will also be done in the medium and long term for a certain number whose difficulties have become chronic,” specifies Florence Askenazy.
However, there is a major problem among children: after experiencing such atrocities, some can remain silent. “If the child does not speak, we must not force him to speak but suggest it to him,” advises Hélène Romano. Otherwise, we can go through drawing or sculpture. » But Florence Askenazy insists: “he will have time to construct his traumatic story afterwards, little by little. Otherwise, it brings back the trauma. »
The psychotherapist also emphasizes the media treatment reserved for these children. “We must protect them from a certain indecency that we may have towards people returning from horror and exposed like trophies. Becoming the hero of such a tragedy is very heavy to bear, especially for a child. » These children will have to return to anonymity so that they do not become “children taken hostage by Hamas” for life. “This should not constitute their identity,” she warns.