At 38, she is preparing to welcome her first child. But what should be a great joy is a moment tinged with anguish for Elisa *. This woman, breaking with her own mother and arriving alone in Nantes in full confinement, has no one with whom to share her “surprise pregnancy”. So, although the process was not easy, she knocked on the door of
“Godmother and You”. This association, present on Saturday at the forum of
Spring of fragility, connects single mothers with sponsor families to provide them with “this essential human link to gain confidence and move forward in life. “
While one in five children lives in a single-parent family, this structure, described as “unprecedented”, is aimed at women who have no one around them to support them or listen to them on a daily basis. “It’s catastrophic how isolated they are,” observes the founder and president Hélène Despagne. It affects all layers of society. From the little youngster on a family and friendly break to the 40-year-old mother who has devoted her life only to work. A lack that would manifest itself more with the arrival of a child. “Motherhood is a weakening period where superficial ties do not last,” said Anne-Laure Des Noës, the head of the Nantes branch. Between fatigue, dependence on babies … Moms need to feel that they exist in someone else’s eyes. “
“A real relationship of trust”
To break this isolation, the association therefore offers mothers who wish to put them in contact with a family with children. Over time, a relationship is woven, between phone calls, trips to the park, sending postcards, small services rendered, or birthdays celebrated together. “It’s a friendly bond, not a week goes by without us giving each other news,” says Virginie *, who has been accompanying a young woman for a year and a half. It’s also a real relationship of trust: I help her make decisions on subjects that you normally discuss with your spouse or parents. I know that she registered me as the person to be notified in an emergency, at the nursery. “
In eight years, nearly sixty pairs have been trained thanks to seven volunteers, including psychologists, who recruit, advise and train sponsor families to listen. And it seems to be going very well for Milène, 24, who over the years has found “a friend, even a mother” who “knows m [s] a situation and don’t [la] not judge ”. Elisa, she has already seen her godmother family twice, with whom she was able to tinker in the room of the future baby. “For me, a child does not rise alone,” confides this woman with a shy smile. Being surrounded, having a good time, is very important so that it can flourish well. “
The association, which is recruiting new families, has just opened two new branches, one in Paris and the other in Lyon.
* the first names with an asterisk have been changed at the request of the persons concerned.