Micky Beisenherz writes about his lost suitcase

M. Beisenherz: Sorry, I’m here privately
Karmageddon!

For us top performers, life is a permanent disappointment in interpersonal relationships. You make an effort, shine time and again with each other – and in return you only get frustration. I recently suffered an injustice that was almost unique. I had to get from Munich to Hamburg quickly on a Monday morning and embarked on the adventure of flying with Lufthansa. What I didn’t know: how literally the phrase “check in luggage” is meant.

In any case, the airline’s Ehrlich Brothers & Sisters offered all their illusionist skills to make the 20-kilo trolley disappear between northern and southern Germany in an hour. Then you stand as lost at the baggage carousel like Mörtel Lugner in front of the vocational school. For luggage, Hamburg Airport is evidently something like the Bermuda Triangle, and responsibility shifts back and forth between the airline and the airport like with an MPK. Path. Puff.

In the suitcase was half a technology store, all of my work, plus a few turtlenecks in bold colors and a plaid coat. I am particularly sorry for the items of clothing as they are no longer available. Which also proves that there are other people who are enthusiastic about sweaters like this. The stork brings the children. The crane makes the suitcases disappear.

Much more serious than the failure of those involved, however, is the injustice that happened to me as a result. Wasn’t I extremely generous to the taxi driver on the drive to the airport? Hadn’t I slipped something to the maids in the hotel? Noble deeds that should have boosted me against such a stroke of fate! Where’s that karma again? Because that happens to me all the time. Minor good deeds are followed by mishaps, annoyances and third-party negligence almost every second.

If I hand in a smartphone that I found on the train to the conductor, I lose my iPod in the taxi that same evening. I’m helping someone on the street to find their cat, gosh, my car’s battery is dead. The grandmother across the street waved friendly, zack, was one faster on Ebay.

The equivalent of the contents of the lost suitcase: around 7,000 euros

Yes, is there no higher authority that looks at my godly actions and, if not rewarded, then at least not punishes me? I even donate! You get very neurotic about it.

The Chinese successfully operate social scoring, a point system in which it is punished with minus points in credit or transport worthiness if you cross the street when it is red, do not clean up dog shit or do not visit your parents. Well, if you not only spit chewing gum on the street, but also criticize the president, you’ve disappeared for 20 years. But you know what I’m talking about, don’t you? Karma may not be short-term, but a kind of cosmic savings club that pays out the good life as a long-term dividend.

I try to stay calm while my wife tyrannizes the shining hotline servants of the airline, more than two weeks after the loss. By the way, the equivalent of the lost content: around 7,000 euros. After all, I’ve just bought a Bahncard again. And if I had used it from Munich to Hamburg instead of flying through the country in an environmentally harmful way, I would still have my suitcase.

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