RHOC’s Braunwyn Windham-Burke, Sean Burke’s Ups and Downs

Braunwyn Windham-Burke and husband Sean Burke were married for more than 20 years, but it wasn’t always been smooth sailing for the Real Housewives of Orange County couple — even before they called it quits.

While Bravo fans met Braunwyn in 2019 when she joined the cast of RHOC for season 14, she started seeing Sean when she was just 18 years old.

“I learned [doing the show] that I can’t always rely on my husband,” she explained in a 2019 interview. “I’ve been with my husband since I was 18, so I had to stand on my own two feet for the first time in my entire adult life. And that was not always easy.”

Braunwyn and Sean tied the knot in 2000 and went on to welcome seven kids: Bella, Rowan, Jacob, twins Caden and Curren, Koa and Hazel. Before the pair welcomed their twins and youngest daughters, however, they actually separated for a short period of time.

“We fought for our family because Sean and I almost got divorced,” Braunwyn recalled on the RHOC aftershow in November 2019. “We’ve been through infidelity. We’ve gone down this road and Sean and I came back stronger.”

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While they welcomed four more kids post-split, Braunwyn ruled out welcoming baby No. 8 in 2020, revealing that she underwent two years of IVF to have the couple’s youngest daughter.

“We worked very hard for this little one, 2 years of IVF and many losses to get her, but when I look at her huge smile, her eyes that light up and her adorable laugh I can tell you, it’s all worth it,” Braunwyn gushed via Instagram. “She’s the easiest baby we’ve ever had, is best friends with her sister and loves to just follow the others around. I’m so grateful for you, thank you for being a part of our family.”

Before season 15 of RHOC started airing in October 2020, Braunwyn sparked split speculation as she promoted a Zoom session with a divorce specialist. The twosome’s relationship took a turn when she came out as a lesbian in December 2020, but it would still be months before they officially split.

Scroll through for more on Braunwyn and Sean’s ups and downs:

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Raising Seven Kids

“I run a pretty strict house, as much of a free spirit as I am,” she told Us in April 2020 about raising seven kids. “I do have a lot of rules and a lot of chores when it comes to everyone chipping in and helping out. So everyone wakes up, they do their part and it’s working.”

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Their Separation

Braunwyn noted that the pair’s separation was “12 years ago” as she opened up about her past infidelity in 2019.  

“I cheated on Sean,” she admitted on the RHOC aftershow. “We separated. I took the kids. He was with someone else too. We were separated, we were in two different homes. I went to Hawaii; I took the kids, I enrolled them in school. I told Sean I was done. I just didn’t want to be a single mom anymore. He traveled 25 days a month.”

Braunwyn noted that her tryst was “very PG.” She explained: “We surfed together, we would go for walks, and I wasn’t ready for anything more but it was just nice to have someone listen.”

After a few months apart, the twosome reunited. “After a few months, he flew out to Hawaii and he got down on one knee and re-proposed to me,” she recalled. “He had quit his job; he was the president of a very successful company. He sold his shares and he walked away and he became a stay-at-home dad for like eight years. He said I would rather choose you guys than my work.”

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Threesomes

On Sean’s 35th birthday, the duo introduced threesomes into their marriage.

“Keep in mind, I’ve been with him a long time. Everything we’ve done, we’ve done together,” Braunwyn said during an interview with Bravo in 2019. “So it was sort of like, ‘Oh, that would be fun.’ And I was kind of like, ‘This is your birthday present.’ So it started as a joke. And then it became, ‘OK, for every monumental birthday, this will be your gift.'”

The twosome also showed off their “love shack” on season 14 of RHOC, revealing they have a special room in their house to sneak away and be “a little bit naughty.”

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

20 Years

The couple seemed happier than ever as they celebrated 20 years of marriage in 2020. “This is us,” she wrote that March via Instagram. “Good, bad and everything in between. #20years #rhoc #igotyoubabe #parentsof7.”

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Trouble in Quarantine

In April 2020, the Bravo star admitted to Us that things were tense at home amid the coronavirus pandemic.

“People are not supposed to be together this much. The other day he walked into the room and I just wanted a moment to myself and in my head, I’m like, ‘Please don’t acknowledge my existence, just don’t even look at me, please don’t acknowledge me. Can we just pretend we’re by ourselves?’ No, I didn’t realize and it sounds crazy too, it is,” Braunwyn told Us exclusively. “I think I gave him a five-minute lecture on how to get the clothes into the hamper, not next to it, into it … I joke that I haven’t fed them to the tigers yet.”

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Split Speculation

A since-deleted Instagram post shared by Braunwyn in September 2020 raised a red flag for fans. “New to the coparenting world? It doesn’t have to suck. It won’t feel like this forever,” the post read. “You just need some perspective … Knowing what to expect will save your sanity.”

That same month, their second oldest daughter, Rowan, shared an Instagram pic with the caption, “F—k. You. Mom.”

Braunwyn subsequently asked her followers for privacy.

“Our family asks for your understanding as we work through some challenging circumstances,” she wrote via Instagram Stories. “45 million Americans will experience mental health issues. This effects almost every family, and ours is no different. We will share with you more when the time is right. We kindly ask for your grace and kindness, and thank everyone for their support.”

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

A Modern Moment

Amid the split speculation, Braunwyn and Sean jetted off to Puerto Rico with friends. “Modern marriage,” she captioned a photo cuddling up to Sean in a pool in October 2020.

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram (2)

Living Apart

The Bravo star confirmed in October 2020 that the twosome are no longer living together. “He’s not living here right now,” she told ET. “Love him dearly, we haven’t gotten along this well in a long time. We’re redefining what marriage means to us. Not following the old, antiquated rules anymore.”

While Braunwyn went on to confirm that there are no “other men” in her life, she played coy when asked whether there was “another woman” in her life.

Credit: Courtesy Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram (2)

Seeing Someone New

Braunwyn revealed to Us in October 2020 that there’s someone “special” in her life — who isn’t Sean. “There’s someone in my life right now that makes me happy and I smile just thinking about, but I kinda want to protect it right now,” she gushed. “I’m not quite ready to put it all out there, everyone in my life that knows me knows what’s happening.”

She added at the time, however, that they have no plans to go their separate ways.

“We are very honest in our communication. There are just some things that I have discovered about myself that I wanna explore a little more and he’s very supportive,” she told Us. “He understands and, you know, I am living a very authentic life right now and I’ve never given myself permission to do that. … I’m 42 and there are just parts of me that … I pushed down and now I’m allowing myself to live authentically.”

Credit: Gregory Pace/Shutterstock

Getting Sober

Braunwyn told Us in October 2020 that her decision to stop drinking changed her marriage. “He’s known that I’ve had a problem, but part of the dynamic of our relationship is he’s an enabler and we have a very codependent relationship,” she told Us. “While I’m getting sober right now, he’s also in his own community support meetings, working on his aspect of it because alcoholism is a family disease. It affects everyone. And, you know, especially with couples, there is a dynamic and we’re working on that.”

She added, “He would get me out of situations before I got ugly. So I needed him. And when I got sober, I didn’t need him anymore. And he felt the distance and he felt left behind. … It’s very hard on a marriage. There’s just a lot of things that we’ve had to uncover [in] therapy with ourselves and each other.”

Credit: Courtesy of Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Moving Back In

Braunwyn revealed in November 2020 that Sean moved back in to their family home.

“Thank you @seanwindhamburke for being by my side these past few crazy months,” she wrote via Instagram. “We might be doing things our own way, but it’s working and it’s working well. So happy to have you back home.? 

Credit: Randy Shropshire/Bravo

Two Decades of Love

“20 years and counting, here’s to keeping it ‘weird,’ and doing things our own way,” the Bravo personality wrote on Instagram in November 2020, alongside a photo of the couple’s vow renewal. “Love you. @seanwindhamburke @babette_schwartz #vowrenewal #itsnotacurseifyoustilllikeeachother #ourway #modernmarriage #bestday #happyanniversary #rhoc #stillgoing.”

Credit: Tommy Garcia/Bravo

Finding Herself

The Bravo personality announced that she is a lesbian in a December 2020 interview with GLAAD. “I’m still getting used to it … I knew I was attracted to women. I got married very young and I never thought about it. So, to be 42 … I’m just now starting to feel like I’m becoming the woman I was supposed to be,” she said. “So, for me to be living completely authentically and say, ‘I’m a lesbian. That was who I have always been.’ This isn’t something that is new ‘cause that I think is what a lot of people will think. ‘Oh, suddenly you’re one.’ No, I’ve always known it. But it took me personally 42 years to be comfortable enough in my own skin to say that.” Braunwyn also noted that her husband has met her girlfriend, Kris, and that she “came over the other night, hung out with the family, had dinner with us.” Sean showed his support for his wife on Instagram after her declaration, writing, “I love you. I’m proud of you. And I support you. Always.”

Credit: Courtesy of Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Holiday Happiness

The couple posed with five of their seven children in December 2020 for their annual Santa photo, days after Braunwyn came out. “Happy Holiday!! Thank you @stylemyholidays for creating this beautiful, safe winter wonderland!!” she captioned the festive Instagram photo. “We haven’t missed a year with Santa in 20 years, and I was so excited when I discovered this magical place in my own backyard!!!” 

Credit: Courtesy of Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Sticking It Out

After coming out as a lesbian, Windham-Burke responded to a fan’s question via Instagram about whether the pair were “staying married” or if she was planning on “moving forward” in her life. “We are trying to do both,” she replied, according to the Real Housewives Franchise fan account. “He’s my best friend and family. We know it might be impossible, but we’re going to try and make this ‘open’ marriage work.”

Credit: Courtesy of Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Rising Tempers

During a December 2020 episode of the Bravo series, the RHOC star confessed that she had gotten physical with her husband more than once in the past. “I just, I lost it. I lost my temper again with Sean belittling me over the vacuum cleaner,” Braunwyn said. “Instead of being like, ‘Yeah, I’ll help you’ — because he’s still going to the office. He’s still working. He’s still getting out of the house. Instead of helping, he made fun of me and I lost it and I smacked him.”

In a confessional interview, she noted that she would get angry with Sean when she was in the early stages of her sobriety journey. “I have hit Sean a couple of times in my life,” she said. “I hit him across the face and I hit him hard. I wanted to go drink. I was angry and I was lashing out and Curren saw it. … Looking back, it was a side of me I’ve never seen. It was bad.”

Credit: Tesla Rae

Moving

In July 2021, the pair revealed via Instagram Live that they are taking a break and living separately, with her moving to Hawaii for the summer with the kids.

“What we would like to do is when this is over, get a house that the kids stay in and then we might go [back and forth],” the former reality star said. “We haven’t decided if, after this little experiment of having a few months apart, if we are gonna come back together and live together as friends and family, or if we’re going to just keep the kids in the house and we’ll come in and out. … We need a break. We need some space right now.”

Credit: Courtesy of Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

No Divorce Papers — for Now

In September 2021, Braunwyn exclusively told Us that she doesn’t see their marriage ending in the midst of her breakup with Fernanda Rocha.

“I don’t think we’re going to get divorced, honestly,” the Bravolebrity said at New York Fashion Week. “I truly don’t think we’re going to. We get along great, we have an open marriage — it’s working for us. We’re happy.”

She added that they are better than ever even as Braunwyn plans a move to New York City. “We really are nailing the coparenting thing. We are best friends,” she emphasized. “We’ve been together for 26 years. He understands that like this has been a dream of mine forever, so he’s supportive!”

Credit: Courtesy of Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

It’s Over

Us confirmed in October 2022 that Braunwyn filed for divorce after 23 years of marriage. The reality TV star cited “irreconcilable differences” as the reason for their split.

Credit: Courtesy of Braunwyn Windham-Burke/Instagram

Coparenting Struggles

As Braunwyn filed for spousal support — claiming she was “unable to provide” for herself or their seven kids — she alleged the pair were going through a coparenting rough patch.

“Although, I am hopeful that the [Sean] and I can resume a good, cooperative, and communicative coparenting arrangement, until and unless that happens, I believe it may be in the children’s best interests to reside primarily with me and have custodial periods of time with the [Sean] where we can maintain separate residences and create a more healthy and less angry environment for the children,” she stated in court docs. “I would hope this would just be a transitionary period where we can learn to move on in a cooperative an amicable manner.”

After the docs were published, the twosome released a joint statement to The Sun: “As many separated people can relate to, things were upsetting for everyone during the early stages of our divorce. However, we are working together toward a path forward for not only our children’s sake, but for the integrity of a 25+ yearlong companionship. We are looking forward to spending the holidays together with our children.”