People tend to be impatient, and they also like to look to their own advantage from time to time. But can that explain why more and more passengers are apparently either already drunk on board a plane or, at the latest, pressurize themselves above the clouds at a speed that no kerosene pump in an airplane could ever manage at an airport?
Holidays are precious, time is too – everyone can imagine for themselves what that means for the holiday season. One thing is certain: these days and weeks must be used as efficiently as possible – thinking about efficiency has long since reached the holidays. Now there are certainly people for whom the holiday only begins when they look at the sunset with an Aperol Spritz in their hand on a beach terrace and gradually stop lamenting about this moment of bliss, how inhumanly exhausting the journey was once again . This helps them glee thievingly for squeezing that free drink from the hotel manager as an apology for some trifle in the room.
But these are the harmless, the nostalgic, the dream-lost – in short: those who let themselves be fobbed off with a miserable mixed drink. Accordingly, they will not get much from their vacation because they are wasting their precious time uselessly. For the pros, however, the holiday fun begins as soon as they close their own front door. Should they seriously wait to get their all-inclusive ribbons on at a hotel in some far corner of the continent, such as the Turkish Riviera or the Canary Islands? After all, you only go to a party pre-heated and thus basically uninhibited. The fun must be maximized.
Professionals also use the waiting time at the airport sensibly and buy up the alcohol stocks of the duty-free shops instead of sitting around drunk in some waiting area. Vodka, whiskey and vermouth are not necessarily cheaper in these shops than in the trusted beverage store. But the bottles are bigger. And it is always safer to be able to use your own on-board resources during a flight. Because who knows when the flight attendant would bring the next gin and tonic, with the shortage of staff these days.
However, the bosses of the airline Ryanair are now causing disillusionment. In view of the fact that customers are so driven to be more efficient, they decided that their employees should not primarily serve alcoholic beverages to passengers in the future, but rather take them away from them. This applies in particular to flights from Great Britain to Ibiza, Palma de Mallorca and Tenerife, to Alicante, Barcelona and Malaga. The number of assaults and riots and the associated delays caused by drunk passengers has simply become too great for Ryanair, especially on these routes. Therefore, the requirement from now on is: only without a flag on the plane, only without a bottle on board. Once again it is evident that when it comes to efficiency, nobody can fool this airline. Let’s toast to that!
Stefan Fischer sometimes just lets himself be intoxicated by a mood on vacation.
(Photo: Bernd Schifferdecker (Illustration))