From a columnist’s point of view, this Friday is a difficult day. The world events in Bavaria lay before him in fragmentary form and eludes interpretation. It’s raining outside, which is why everyone is upset that it’s raining. But writing a gloss about it is not possible. If something really happens, you look stupid, and as an author you want to avoid that at all costs. Söder is on vacation in the Allgäu and rides a bike. This has no more than three lines, which is why the message that the employees of the Free State are sick less often seems interesting for two seconds. But jokes about officials have a beard longer than Gandalf’s. So away with it.
Self-experience remains. The columnist recently saw and heard some events in a Lower Bavarian restaurant. At the next table, a man told his friend his experiences in the chat room for tattooed singles. It was all very, very interesting and new, but obviously not intended for publication. So unfortunately also eliminated. Too bad. That would have been it. The waitress in a dirndl suddenly threw two pints of beer on the table in front of the columnist and stared at a guest who was sitting behind him with Husqvarna suspenders and a straw hat. She snapped at him that he had it “just about together” and should be “staad”. Because music could be heard, the columnist asked whether an opera air was taking place somewhere in the old town. You want to talk to the locals. The waitress replied that it was a private event, which she will shoot into soon. In Bavarian: “reischiassn”. yes, good But write 60 lines about it?
Something from the Gäubodenfest maybe. What nice. Was there something? A fully fueled guy on a bench asked the columnist if he was from Bayerischer Rundfunk. No, he answered truthfully, from the Süddeutsche Zeitung. The “Süddeitsche”, she’s something from the left, that’s what this Prantl writes, said the man on the bench.
The columnist was a little sad because he would have liked to talk about something else. Even about the drought or the corn harvest, if you like. All of this is useless for a gloss. That’s why Unter Bayern is unfortunately canceled today.