The stand-up comedian and author Nicole Jäger took part in the VOX show “Showtime of my Life – Stars against Cancer” to draw attention to the fact that many overweight people do not dare to go to the doctor out of shame. In an interview with the star, she shares personal experiences and encourages those affected.
Nicole Jäger is 39 years old and once weighed 340 kilos. After deciding to lose weight under medical supervision, she had an experience with a doctor that should never happen to anyone. in the starinterview, the stand-up comedian and author from Hamburg points out that she is not the only one with this experience and gives tips on how those affected can deal with such a situation.
Ms. Jäger, you took part in the VOX show “Showtime of my Life – Stars Against Cancer” in February. Previously you had reservations about participating. Why?
I was absolutely worried when the request came and initially declined. It was perfectly clear to me that I would never undress on German television. I didn’t want to dance naked either – and certainly not topless. “So far it’s still coming!”, I thought. This is mainly because I am the way I am: as a fat woman you are already exposed. There were many reasons for me not to take part. I don’t look good, my body is a ruin. I’ve lost a lot of weight, but I’m still overweight at 150 kilos. I have scars, cellulite and everything a woman doesn’t want to have. I’m not toned, I look like what you look like when you’ve lost a lot of weight. Added to this was the fear of the reactions.
What finally made you decide to participate?
I spent a long time discussing this with my manager Marc and my best friend, trying to explain to them why I didn’t want to be on the show. During these discussions, I realized that I was actually taking part for precisely these reasons got to. Diversity is always talked about, but never shown. People need to understand that obesity is a problem, but it is the problem of the person concerned. It’s just not the general public’s business.
How were the reactions after the show?
I was worried that I would have to hire a whole team to take care of the hate comments. There are always people who can’t keep themselves in check. Overall, however, the reactions were very, very positive and overwhelming for me. There were so many comments. The majority came from women who are slim and who don’t feel perfect either – but many men also wrote. I never expected it to move so many people. And ultimately it also shows how important the topic is.
Have you personally had negative experiences with doctors?
Oh yeah. When I was 800 pounds and I wanted to do something other than diet all the time. I thought that I would really die otherwise. I wanted to seek medical help because I realized that I couldn’t get any further on my own. So I went to a Berlin practice. Physically, it was already an insane challenge to even leave the house for the first time. I arrived at the practice in severe pain and sweaty and was looked at like an insect. The doctor asked what I want. I replied that I have an appointment, I obviously have a problem and need help. She then advised me not to die in her practice. She has no idea how else she’s supposed to carry me out again. She didn’t say that in the treatment room, but at the counter. The practice staff stood around them, all of whom found it incredibly funny. The doctor then agreed to take a blood count, which I could have picked up a week later. But she also said that it would be better for society if I didn’t survive, because people like me will never become anything. I would only be a nuisance to the system because, being a fat woman, I’m scum.
Have people also contacted you who had had similar experiences with doctors?
hundreds. There were a lot of personal stories under my posts, but also by message or email. Many people write that they have also felt that they were being treated in a negative way, that they were being handled strangely, or that they were being told that they were gross.
Were there people among them who became ill as a result?
A few have reported symptoms worsening after being dismissed by doctors.
Are there many overweight people who are ashamed to go to a doctor?
An incredible number of overweight women do not dare to take part in cancer screening. Many people from my community also confirm this. In the very worst case, this means that people die earlier because of it. Only because those affected are more afraid of the reaction of a single person than of a negative diagnosis. This state of affairs is unsustainable and the issue will not change unless we communicate it openly.
Do you have a message for people on how to take courage?
Above all, I believe that it’s okay not to be perfect. It’s also okay not to be okay. Shame in front of a doctor must never be the reason (in the worst case) to die earlier. If you don’t dare, you should take someone with you to the practice. Maybe your spouse or a friend.
How can those affected deal with the situation when a doctor says something ugly?
There are two ways you can still find peace for yourself: either you make another appointment in the practice and openly talk about what was wrong – or you look for another doctor. Everyone has the right to be treated as equals, whether they are at the doctor’s or the post office. Whether tall, short, fat, thin, disabled or not physically perfect. I now have amazing doctors and there are a lot of them.
What do you wish from doctors and medical professionals who may not be so aware of the shame and fear of their patients?
After “Showtime of my Life” I was also addressed by many doctors: “Hey Ms. Jäger, I’m also someone who usually likes to prejudice patients. I wasn’t really aware of that. But I’ll try to do things differently in the future.” That was one of the best reactions. There are always doctors who, in principle, first give a lecture about being overweight, but overweight people are not blind or stupid. He can say, “Your obesity is a risk factor for breast cancer,” because that has something to do with his diagnosis.
But I don’t want to hear a doctor’s opinion as a private person, because I don’t want to become his friend. It is not a doctor’s job to judge a person, it is his job to help. Overweight people know they are overweight. You are asked about it all the time. So people go to the doctor with an emotional crater anyway. If he then throws in a bomb or picks on it, the person doesn’t go home and suddenly picks up. The person goes home, feels bad and gains five kilos.
I’ve almost always had good experiences with saying directly: Before I don’t go to the doctor at all, I prefer to say if I feel unwell. Personally, I meet doctors very openly and comment on what they see. You can’t be aggressive, that doesn’t get you any further. I then tell my story and indicate that I understand that being overweight is a problem. The responsibility lies not only on the doctors’ side, but also on the patient’s side. I think communicating and finding a way together is the right thing to do.
All episodes of “Showtime of my Life – Stars Against Cancer” are available in full on RTL+