Important books: “Narcissism, Seduction and Power” by Bärbel Wardetzki

series

Important books
What is actually seductive about narcissists? This book explains things

Books can touch, move, teach and, at best, become significant in the further course of life if they open your eyes or change your perspective in areas such as education, relationships or others. We have compiled just such books in this series. This time the focus is on the book “Narcissism, Seduction and Power” by Bärbel Wardetzki.

Narcissists only think about themselves and their own needs, are ruthless and devoid of empathy: this is how many people imagine a person who fits this description. But how can it be that narcissists often find themselves in a (albeit usually unhealthy) relationship and are often not as repulsive as they might initially sound? On the contrary: Narcissists are often even more attractive – to very specific groups of people.

What these are, explains Dr. Bärbel Wardetzki in her book “Narcissism, Seduction and Power”. The author, who already convinced me with her book “Female Narcissism”, reveals that people with narcissistic traits are particularly attracted to those who have less obvious self-confidence and would like to adorn themselves with the extroverted character of the other person. These are usually people who have been disappointed by other people. Be it from parents, partners or even political people. They are looking for someone to hope for. Narcissists are ideal for this. The problem: They rarely keep what they promise or claim to be. Then it becomes unhealthy.

And the principle can be adapted to relationships, but also to other areas of life. Why so many people voted for Donald Trump as president seems completely incomprehensible to many of us. But Wardetzki explains very clearly how this can happen – and how it can then happen that narcissists drive themselves into the wall with their unhealthy behavior. The example of Trump, which runs through the entire book, shows the actions of a narcissist. In a direct comparison with people in the same position (for example Obama, who also appears in the book), the author explains in a very understandable way when narcissistic traits are healthy and good and when they become a problem.

The qualified psychologist is primarily referring to male narcissism, which runs completely differently than female narcissism. Wardetzki makes it clear that it is not always men who suffer from this personality disorder, as well as the reason why she prefers to avoid the word “narcissist”.

Important books: That’s why “Narcissism, Seduction and Power” is one of them

And it is precisely because the phenomenon of people with narcissistic traits and their admirers can occur everywhere that it is so important to read her book. To perhaps catch yourself falling for one. Whether you yourself have deficits that you would like to see him fill. Or just to be able to expose narcissistic people in positions of power and know how to deal with them. Because people with narcissistic traits also have weaknesses and strong deficits that they want to compensate for with their behavior. Bärbel Wardetzki also makes this clear.

As with many relationships in life, in the end it’s about understanding the other person and yourself and recognizing the motivation for your own actions – be it when voting, in relationships or friendships – and shaping them in a healthy way. Another book that helps broaden your horizons and improve interactions. And therefore an important book.

Tip: You can find more book recommendations from the editorial team on our topic page.

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