prevention
“Ejaculate responsibly”: Why we have misunderstood the matter with the sperm so far
Many men prefer to forgo condoms and rely on their women to use contraception.
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The introduction of the pill made women’s sex lives freer and more carefree. An emancipatory milestone, but also a mistake in thinking, says Gabrielle Blair. She wrote a book about contraception.
It’s the same thing with sex. While it’s a lot of fun at best, it also comes with a big catch in heterosexual relationships – the possibility of unwanted pregnancy. At least if the man ejaculates thoughtlessly, says Gabrielle Blair. The mother of six has written an entire book about sperm. And says: “Sperm should be seen as a dangerous body fluid.”
A clever, enlightened man knows how to prevent him, do you think? Unfortunately not. But women also not. In “responsibly ejaculate: 28 reasons why contraception has to become a male thing,” Blair shows how little reflecting society still deals with the contraceptive question. So she points out that it is still social consensus that women wear the main load when it comes to contraception. They are the ones who can become pregnant, so they are the ones who have to protect themselves.
Men must take responsibility for sperm
Men are more than 50 times more fertile than women. They constantly produce sperm, but women only one egg cell per cycle. Theoretically, men can fertilize with any ejaculation, but women are only fertilized for about 24 hours a month. Nevertheless, the party that, from a purely objective point of view, contributes the least biologically to fertilization is expected to assume most, if not all, of the responsibility for proper contraception. Complete madness, says Blair.
For generations, women naturally took the pill, used contraceptive rings or had the IUD inserted and not only paid a lot for it, they also put up with nasty side effects. There are usually condoms in the bedside table. In short, they would do everything to ensure that sperm is fended off. The pill, on the other hand, does not exist for the man and otherwise contraceptives are rare for the male part of the species. Rar, but there are. Best example: the condom.
There are contraceptives for men – but they are unpopular
The condom as one of two very effective contraceptives for the man, which is not only easy to get, but is also easy to use, is still demonized by many as a fun brake. The argument: Sex feels less good with pre -servative. Many men therefore only use condoms when absolutely necessary and stop using them as soon as it is clear that the woman uses other forms of contraception. Blair believes that the story of the man as a condom press leader is simply accepted and even supported and continued with it. Instead of seeing the condom as a nuisance, it should be seen as a kind of seat belt.
She argues that with a little experiment, every man can find a well -functioning condom, so that in combination with the right lubricant, the loss of pleasure is reduced to a minimum. Based on this, she asks: Is it really reasonable that the woman sometimes takes serious health restrictions, just so that the man doesn’t even have to make the most minimal smears when feeling feel? The list of side effects that can occur in hormonal contraceptives for women are known to be long. These include acne, depression, thrombosis, heart attacks, increased appetite and strokes.
“Ejaculate responsibly: 28 reasons why contraception has to become a man’s issue” by Gabrielle Blair has been published by Ullstein Verlag, 176 pages, 18.99 euros.
If the woman is controlled, it does not take the man out of duty
The fact that women have the opportunity to use contraceptives is a real emancipatory achievement. It is no longer dependent on daring ovulation calculations and the good will of the man if she wants to have sex for sex and does not want to risk pregnancy. She has her family planning in her own hands. But release that Men from taking responsibility for their sperm themselves? Blair doesn’t find that. She says it’s not too much to ask that men stop mindlessly “placing” their sperm into their sexual partner’s vagina.
Instead, the patriarchal mechanism still takes effect when it comes to contraception: “Women’s suffering is acceptable as long as it makes life easier for men.” She vehemently speaks for vasectomies and explains why this initially sounds radical, compared to what is expected from women, but is a kinker flash. The procedure is cheap, uncomplicated and quick. It can also be reversed and is in no way comparable to female sterilization. The vasectomy also has no influence on libido, the eules or performance itself. Anyone who is afraid that the refertilization should not be lucky, according to Blair, have to freeze seeds in advance.
Everything goes too far? On the contrary, Blair says and demands: “If women are expected to use their contraceptive method correctly, the same can be expected of men.”
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