PSG supporters are getting used to it. It’s early March, and the climax of their weeks will now come down to “Koh-Lanta” and “Top Chef”. Because yes, their football season is already over. Not even a small French Cup to eat, OM went through it a few weeks ago. Their team only has to manage day-to-day business in Ligue 1, where they have an eight-point lead with 12 matches remaining. Not enough to vibrate in the cottages.
Fortunately, there is always the backstage, where between spats, rumors and grandiloquent speeches on the changes to come to progress, the PSG is in this area well part of the gratin of Europe. From experience, we can already imagine what the next few months of the Parisian club will look like.
March 11: Nasser reassembles the troops after a rotten match in Brest
Tossed about as impossible as possible at Le Blé, PSG is having a hard time remotivating itself. Discreet after Munich, the president calls everyone to order. Paris has a place to hold, we have to come out of this season from the top while preparing for the next one. “We will take the time to think about what needs to be changed. But we believe in our players, in our project, ”he said, like almost every year at the same time.
March 19: Fans attack players
For their return to the Park against Rennes, the Parisians are greeted coldly. The CUP releases a banner “Our patience has limits”, and particularly targets Messi. Nasser takes it for his rank too. This time, change is no longer an option.
April 3: The Mbappometer is back on 20 minutes
Tick, tock, tick, tock. “The Chiringuito” has obviously revived the Mbappé offensive, who REALLY has no other choice but to come to Real Madrid to win major titles. It’s time for us to take our Mbappometer out of the boxes, a registered trademark that proved its worth last year. We left until August 31.
April 23: Mbappé plants a quintuplet against Angers and promises that he will stay
The striker wanders in Ligue 1. While the rumors have been linked since the beginning of the month, he invites himself into the mixed zone of the Raymond-Kopa stadium to send a message: “I said a few weeks ago that I was thinking of nothing other than enjoying the good days of PSG. This is still the case for now. Of course, everyone remembers only the end of the sentence.
April 25: According to ” The Athletic »the Mbappé clan is negotiating with Real for a transfer this summer
The Frenchman’s representatives were seen in Madrid eating tapas a stone’s throw from the Plaza Mayor. The Anglo-Saxon media, always well informed, evokes “a constructive dialogue” during an interview with Florentino Perez. According to “Le Chiringuito”, it is as if it were done. “He apologized for the way he treated Real last year,” assures Josep Pedrerol, tremolos in his voice.
April 27: “The trend is rather for a start without moving”, declares Fayza Lamari in ” brand »
A position to say the least vague, on which Spain is torn for three days. It’s actually a rough translation taken from an interview with Kyks’ mom from March 2021.
May 10: The Spanish press claims that Zidane will be “99%” the next PSG coach
The file would have been initiated by the Emir Al-Thani in person, for whom the triple winner of the C1 with Real Madrid is clearly the chosen one. Responsible for finalizing the file, Nasser al-Khelaïfi will be fired if he fails – again.
May 20: “No more privileges and privileges”, assures Nasser
We expected it, the president chose the day after the formalization of the title of champion to give his annual interview at Parisian in which he promises that this is the last time we take him back and that next season, the bullshit is over. Legend has it that there are still a few people who believe in it.
June 4: PSG wins its 75th French championship title after a draw against Clermont under the whistles of the Park
The club still prepared its best party for the occasion, with lots of fireworks, American-style sound effects, and a giant tarp carrying the message “KYLIAN RESTE PLEASE”. The party is magnificent, 7 minutes flat in a three-quarters empty stadium.
June 9: Messi exercises his option for an additional year, the club has sold 5% of its capital to convince him
Among the other conditions, a dry-cleaning bonus. At each defensive race, the Argentinian will receive 50,000 euros.
June 12: According to “Le Parisien”, Mbappé asked to leave, but above all without getting wet publicly
According to the club, “no chance even against a check for 400 million euros”. In Spain, the columnists of the “Chiringuito” are already on the verge of burnout.
June 15: Mediapart reveals that a digital army ordered by management has been tasked with taking down Galtier on the networks, blaming him for all the failures of the season
After counter-investigation, it will turn out that all the haters were real.
June 21: The CR7 rumor is gaining momentum
With 20 goals in 12 Saudi League games and a promising start under Roberto Martinez with Portugal (three penalties scored), the five-time Ballon d’Or player wants to revive in Europe. Nasser still dreams of associating him with Messi for his Ehpad Saint-Germain project.
June 30: PSG announces the dismissal of Christophe Galtier
No need to strain, just take the press release sent for Pochettino and change the name. “Paris Saint-Germain confirms that it has put an end to its collaboration with Christophe Galtier. The club would like to thank him and his staff for their work and wish them the best for the future. »
July 6: “We will have to sell to buy” because of the nasty financial fair play, explains “L’Equipe”
Problem, nobody wants to divide their salary by four to play the mid-table of Serie A. We learn in the same article that PSG will lose 140 million euros. It’s a little less than the year before, and maybe the year before. But does anyone still really matter?
July 9: Mbappé on vacation in the Balearic Islands with a white t-shirt. Guino al Madrid?
July 12: Leonardo is back
July 13: Leonardo leaves
July 14: Patrick Kluivert is seen at the factory
No one really knows what he’s doing there. “Badrig? asks NAK. From sources close to the former football director, neither does he. His mere presence is in any case enough to give fans nightmares.
July 15: Mbappé already back
He shortened his vacation by 23 days to be ready for the recovery and the champions trophy against TFC, the first trophy in play of the 2023-2024 season. “Kylian is like that, he wants to win everything”, confides his entourage
July 17: Thiago Motta is appointed coach
The leaders “were amazed by the results and the game offered by his Bologna team”, according to the club’s press release. The former midfielder, zero European match on a bench, will bring “his rigor and a modern vision of football” to take PSG on a course. Meanwhile, Zidane is still without a club.
July 19: According to several sources, Luis Campos is still actively working on the transfer window behind the scenes
Her goals ? Rayan Cherki, Julian Alvarez, Rafa Silva, and all who play midfield in La Liga Sagres. Hey, wouldn’t we add a little João Mario to the list?
July 22: Antero Henrique is seen at the Factory
He is in charge of the special operation “emergency degreasing” as it is nicknamed behind the scenes. Challenge accepted, “but not before having tasted these petit fours over there, they don’t look bad”.
July 24: Freshly arrived in Paris, Milan Skriniar crosses paths during the American tour against LA Galaxy
Unavailable until February 2024. Danilo Pereira, appointed captain in place of Marquinhos, who no longer travels to stay with his family, goes down a notch.
July 29: Paris slaps 120 million on Gonçalo Ramos, the man of the C1 half at Benfica
One more striker, you never know, it can be useful.
August 2: Real Madrid ready to draw 250 million for Mbappé?
Oh no, sorry, it’s news from 2021 false alarm.
August 8: Etikite returns to Reims for a loan without a purchase option
Balogun makes the opposite way against a check for 45 million euros.
August 13: BOMBAZO. Mbappé absent from training to put pressure on management according to several Spanish newspapers
There is panic in the newsrooms until the reassuring press release from PSG: Mbappé suffers from flu syndrome because of the air conditioning in the restaurant of his last commercial op in LA, the video of which has gone viral: we see Kylian coughing with a Kentucky accent: “Yeaaaah men i’m sick you knaaaaw, but i’m okayyy!” »
August 30: Even Newcastle did not want it, Neymar queda
He’s coming back stronger than ever Counter-Strike and in poker, where he is aiming for the world title. McDonald’s, his new sponsor, dedicates a new burger to him, the 180, in tribute to the number of days a year he is injured.
August 31: Full 24 hours without interruption side ” Chiringuitos »
The show, titled “Ahora o nunca”, deals exclusively with the future of Kylian Mbappé. Pedrerol achieves the feat of neither eating nor sleeping during the entire sequence. Special envoys are posted at all airports in Spain until midnight. But he won’t come. The live ends with a fixed shot of five minutes on a silent Pedrero. drama king.
September 2: PSG hold open training at the Parc des Princes to celebrate Mbappé’s non-start
The price of the place is 48 euros but the stadium is full to attend the presentation of an honorary trophy to Kylian, record holder for the number of rakes passed to Real Madrid.
September 4: The hype is mounting around the new PSG
Sixteen goals in three games (including 12 from Mbappé) for Thiago Motta’s debut on the bench. “This year is the right one! ” AT 20 minutes, the editor-in-chief orders an article: “Why Paris will not lose a match this season and win the C1”. Like what, the PSG is not alone in not learning from its mistakes.