Mamas favorite
Are you allowed to like one child more than another?
It is normal to be annoyed by one of your children from time to time – but can you have one better than the other?
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There are few no-gos when it comes to raising children, but that is not possible: Our author believes that you should definitely not say if a child is your favorite.
From Viola Kaiser
This text first appeared at this point at brigitte.de.
When a distant acquaintance recently said that she has one of her four children best, a chill ran down my spine. To think that is a bit nasty, but somehow understandable. (Especially when one or two of the youngsters tend to pound each other all the time or toss on the floor in front of the supermarket checkout when there is no lollipop – and another one doesn’t).
To say the whole thing publicly, on the other hand, I find really, really antisocial. Personally, I am of the opinion that mothers are allowed to do practically everything: drinking, thinking nasty things, sometimes being lazy. That’s why nobody has to have a guilty conscience. But to say out loud that you have a favorite child even crosses my line.
Better to lie!
Not because I don’t understand that mothers go crazy sometimes, but because I feel sorry for others, no matter what kind of asshole children they are. It just sucks when you know that even your own mother might love you, but still find others better. I don’t think you can really get rid of that for the rest of your life. In fact, studies on the subject say the less popular ones are at higher risk of lower self-esteem, depression, and anxiety disorders.
Doesn’t surprise me a bit. I am basically in favor of honesty, but in that case you should lie really well. Sure, there might be a favorite with multiple mothers, of course we’re all human, but that’s where the performance has to be. Even if you have to lie for it – or just keep your mouth shut. Unfortunately there is no alternative.
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Equal rights for everyone
There is also another possibility: Maybe you really like all children just as much. Sometimes the one less, sometimes the other more, but basically the same amount, just different because every person is different. Equal rights at all levels, so to speak. After all, it has never hurt.