Relationships: Psychologist: “The mother is extremely important”

Psychologist: “The mother is extremely important”

The psychologist and author Stefanie Stahl in Trier. photo

© Harald Tittel/dpa

What your relationship with your own mother is like can be crucial for your life. If it’s good, it shouldn’t just be cared for on Mother’s Day, says best-selling author Stahl.

The relationship with According to psychologist Stefanie Stahl, mother shapes an entire life. “The mother is extremely important. The mother is basically the most important thing in a relationship,” the best-selling author told the German Press Agency on Friday in Trier ahead of Mother’s Day this Sunday. “If your own mother doesn’t love you and you have the feeling that my mother didn’t really want me, then that’s really a heavy burden for your whole life,” said Stahl.

Conversely, the feeling is: “My mother wanted me and is happy that I exist, an incredible gift for life.” Because this means “an incredible amount” for your own self-esteem. “And self-esteem is so important because it also determines my self-image, and my self-image also determines how I perceive other people,” said Stahl, a Hamburg native who has lived in Trier for many years.

What mothers could expect from their children? “What they set as an example and what values ​​they pass on to their children,” she said. “If you have built a loving bond and have warmth and understanding for your children, then you can expect that the children will also bond lovingly with you and that there will be room for understanding.”

With regard to Mother’s Day, she said: “I think good relationships should be cultivated every day. But of course it’s also a really nice ritual to say: Hey, Mom, today is Mother’s Day.”

With her psychological guide “The child in you must find a home,” Stahl has been number one on the annual bestseller list for seven years (2017 to 2023).


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