Study from Canada
There are only three basic types of men – which one are you?
Even relationships with traditional roles still have supporters today.
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How do men build their relationships today, asks a study. There are only three basic patterns: neo-traditionalists, egalitarians and progressives. And all three types have their dark sides.
In a study published in the summer of 2023, researchers in Canada asked what ideas men have about their relationships. They found three basic types of masculinity that shape how men imagine an intimate relationship. The study leader from the University of British Columbia analyzed extensive interviews with 92 heterosexual men aged 19 to 43. Despite different cultural backgrounds, three basic patterns emerged. Women can therefore only choose between these three models.
Neo-Traditionalists: Men who largely follow traditional gender roles and, for example, see themselves as breadwinners and protectors in their see relationship.
Egalitarian: Men who strive for an equal partnership. They value reciprocity and a fair amount of give and take.
Progressives: Men who work to increase gender equality in their relationships by having conversations with their partner to determine who does what.
But how can you imagine the three types in concrete terms? A few quotes should bring the terms to life. For the neo-traditionalists, time has actually stood still in the 1950s. The men have a clear understanding of their duties, but expect a very traditional role from women. “Most of the time she does the housework… while I do the male duties, like washing the car. I also go shopping sometimes and do some painting around the house.” The man sees himself as a fair patriarch: “The man is the head of the family… he is responsible for ensuring that the relationships are equal.”
In contrast, the egalitarian concept often requires compromises to be negotiated. The ideal seems to be to divide up the duties using an Excel spreadsheet. “There were conflicts where my girlfriend felt she cooked more often than I did, which was true,” says one representative of this type. “We solved this by planning a meal date days in advance. For example, if she cooks three days, I cook three days too. Then I think that by having a more rigid schedule like this, a more quantifiable schedule, we were able to divide the tasks even more evenly.”
The progressive model, on the other hand, requires a lot of thought, says Justin. “It takes work to be a person who maintains an equal relationship. It takes self-reflection, reflection on our society, reflection on what you want as a person, what your partner wants as a person, and it takes a lot of emotional introspection to build a relationship that is equal, safe, where vulnerability is valued, where intimacy is built in.”
Exploring the reality of life in relationships
This project is the latest study from a men’s health research program that examines the link between masculinity and mental health in men. “We wanted to understand how different types of masculinities affect men’s relationships and their mental health. We found that these masculine types were associated with different benefits as well as challenges. The small project is part of a larger context. Since the 1980s, gender roles, identities and relationships have been changing rapidly. Everyone is familiar with the discussions, but there is a lack of research on how the change is specifically reflected in relationships.”
Little is known about how younger men work in their personal lives to build relationships today, said Dr Oliffe. The whole research project is intended to show a way to healthier relationships to promote the health of men, their partners and families. Men who actively advocate for gender equality and social justice achieve better mental wellbeing. Men who question current gender equality ideals face isolation or criticism from others, which can also affect their mental health. In addition, small glitches emerged in the interviews: egalitarian men, who uphold equality in principle, have difficulty when it comes to actually sharing domestic tasks 50-50.
Source: Social Science & Medicine